How often do you stop and think about how you may be perceived or what affect your presence has on everyone else you're around? Whether you're a mom, an executive, a business owner, or a manager, how you show up influences those around you.
How do you want people to see you? Perhaps you want to be viewed as a confident, humble, thoughtful leader who is directing your company towards success. When you talk with your team, however, you question their abilities and you look to blame someone or something when a plan doesn't come to fruition. In that situation, will your team see you as confident, humble, and thoughtful?
As a leader, your team (or family) expect you to guide them by example. Not only that - they want you to. When you don't lead by example, there is a miscommunication around expectations. You're telling your team "do as I say, not as I do," which can cause frustration and a decrease in morale. As a boss, you should exude the qualities you expect your employees to have, plus additional ones you may feel that someone sitting at the head of the table should have. If you don't trust your team to get their work done, why would you expect your teammates to trust each other?
You may have realized that how you want to show up and how others view you are misaligned. What should you do? Choose to show up differently. How you react to a situation is instinct, but how you respond is a choice. And you can choose to alter your default reaction by becoming aware of it and what triggers you. Rather than feeling dismay when you lose a deal or when someone really valuable quits the company, you can think "what's the opportunity here?" and can gain an advantage you wouldn't have seen if you were only focused on the problem. By raising your energy level, you can be seen as the leader you wish to be perceived as. And that, in turn, will raise the energy level of your team and bring forth the successes you wish to see.
You don't have to have a certain title to be a leader - everybody leads. By being aware of how you're perceived and your reaction to stressors, you can choose if that's how you want to show up. No matter what the situation – you always have a choice in how you respond. Reach out to me if you wish to learn more about how you're showing up or how to respond differently in certain situations.